The Leadership Capacity You’re Not Practicing: Emotional Regulation at Every Aperture
- David Cicerchi
- 4 days ago
- 4 min read
By David Cicerchi
Certified Leadership Aperture Coach
As leaders in the typical organization, we’re taught to control our emotions. Be composed. Stay calm under pressure. But what if that approach—while often necessary—is only part of the picture?
In times of complexity and volatility, emotional regulation isn’t just about keeping it together. It’s about tuning your emotional aperture to fit the needs of moment.
That’s the power of the Leadership Aperture model, developed by the telos institute as part of their Vertical Frontier leadership program. As a partnering coach with telos, I have come to discovered how powerfully this model can help executives and teams adapt their leadership behaviors to match the needs of the situation. It provides a map that actually catalyzes the capacity to navigate effectively in complex or ever-changing circumstances that don't have a clear path or handbook for action.
What is Leadership Aperture?
Think of leadership aperture like a camera lens. In a camera, aperture adjusts how much light enters the lens. In leadership, it adjusts how much information and complexity you let in—and how widely you perceive and engage with your reality.
There are three core aperture settings:
Narrow Aperture → Zoomed in, focused, short-term action
Medium Aperture → Measured, systematic, strategic achievement
Wide Aperture → Expansive, visionary, long-term, non-linear
No one aperture is “best,”, because it depends on the context and what is needed. What matters is knowing how to shift between them intentionally. Furthermore, these apertures show up across multiple Leadership Intelligences that telos has identified, such as Decision Making, Team Governance, and Cultural Stewardship. Over time, practice and intention, we develop what telos refers to as "Range", the capacity for widening our aperture, and "Wisdom", the ability to choose whichever aperture is most appropriate for the situation.
Let’s explore how Leadership Aperture plays out in one crucial Intelligence of leadership: Emotional Regulation.
The Sliding Scale of Emotional Regulation
Emotional regulation isn’t about denying emotion, nor is it about just letting it flow. It’s about engaging it in ways that increase impact, connection, and clarity.
In the Leadership Aperture model, emotional regulation unfolds across three apertures:
Narrow Aperture: Expressive
At this setting, a leader’s emotions are immediately expressed. Anger shows up as visible frustration. Joy becomes enthusiasm. Vulnerability might come through in real time.
This can be powerful: it builds authenticity, creates emotional resonance, and catalyzes action. But it can also be disruptive or overwhelming if uncontained.
When to use it: When authenticity matters more than polish—like energizing a team in a crisis or breaking through group denial.
Medium Aperture: Composed
Here, the leader is measured and emotionally self-contained. Emotions are acknowledged internally, but expressed sparingly and strategically.
This is the dominant mode for many professionals—especially those in high-stakes roles. It signals maturity, steadiness, and professionalism, but can become paralyzing or lead to disengagement if emotions are too composed.
When to use it: When clarity and confidence are needed—like leading a board meeting, giving a press briefing, or managing stakeholder tension.
Wide Aperture: Attuned
This setting invites careful emotional attunement—to self, others, and the field. The leader is present to the emotional undercurrents in a room and skillfully integrates emotion with cognition and intuition. It recognizes the value of emotions in motivation, trust, and learning, and the inseparability between the mind and the heart.
This doesn’t mean crying in every meeting. It means naming what’s real—yours and others’—without flooding the room, in service to the flow of energy toward a shared purpose. It’s emotionally intelligent leadership in action.
When to use it: When trust, empathy, and alignment are needed—especially during transitions, conflict resolution, or navigating ambiguity.
Examples of Emotional Regulation in Action
Composed to Attuned: Building Trust During Layoffs
Julia, a VP of Operations, had to announce layoffs to her department. Her instinct was to stay composed: read the script, stick to talking points, don’t show emotion.
But in her Leadership Aperture coaching, she explored widening her aperture—becoming more emotionally attuned.
In the meeting, she spoke from this wider aperture:
“I want to acknowledge how hard this is. I’ve felt the weight of this decision. And I care deeply about every person here.”
The room softened. People didn’t just hear what she said. They felt that she cared. A composed aperture would not have landed that impact. Attuned did.
Attuned to Expressive: Unlocking Energy in a Team Retreat
Later, Julia led a retreat with her senior team. She arrived grounded and attuned, and overviewed a compelling vision—but the room felt stuck. Too polished. Overly cautious. The energy was a bit rigid, and simply naming it was not sufficient; it needed a bit of a catalyst.
She sensed it—and shifted to a narrow aperture moment.
She stood up and said:
“Can I be real with you? I’m frustrated. We keep skimming the surface. I want us to have the courage to speak the truth.”
That moment cracked the surface. The room erupted into real dialogue—grievances, vision, renewed commitment. Her willingness to express emotion catalyzed a breakthrough.
Why It Matters
Great leaders don’t suppress emotion. They regulate it with skill—and shift their aperture based on what the moment requires.
In today’s complex world, that means:
Expressive when it’s time to energize and move
Composed when clarity and credibility are key
Attuned when trust, empathy, and insight are needed to attend to complex dynamics
The best leaders don’t default to one mode. They develop the inner capacity to discern and shift.
That’s what The Vertical Frontier leadership program cultivates. And that’s what I coach leaders to embody through Leadership Aperture.
Is It Time to Upgrade Your Organization’s Leadership Operating System?
If you're an executive or HR leader tasked with building resilient, adaptive leaders who can thrive in complexity—not just execute in certainty—then Leadership Aperture coaching and The Vertical Frontier may be right for your team.
Schedule a free discovery call to explore whether a vertical leadership development program fits your organization’s goals.
Let’s help your leaders move beyond composure—and into the full range of human-centered, complexity-ready leadership.
For more information about the telos institute, Leadership Aperture, and The Vertical Frontier, please visit https://www.leadershipaperture.com/
Please watch the impromptu, informal video that inspired this blog post (with the writing assistance of ChatGPT):
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